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Tuesday, 27 December 2011

S.M.S - Save My Soul.

Its been a long wait. more than a year. and still.. I wait...

somewhere deep inside, I feel like Tom hanks of Cast Away.

lost on a lonely island and waiting everyday for help, while trying hopelessly to survive. The feeling arises from inside, the exact source though is still unknown but there are lots of noises inside.

I close my eyes trying to picturize myself in terms any other than my human form and the only scene that comes up is of that of a bird in a cage. Everyday, every moment looking at the blue sky outside and hoping that the owner, someday will forget to latch the cage doors and I shall take off to scale the far and wide lengths of the eternally never ending sky. That I shall prove it, that the wide spread blue umbrella above is just small for my petite wings and it still holds the will of conquering it. But even if someday I find that the doors is unlocked by mistake. I wont fly...!!!

Am no jonathan swift "seagull" wanting to master the art of flight. Am just me, waiting for my turn to fly. Waiting at my ending for "that" miracle that sets me free. I agree that my hopes are getting decayed with the everyday slogged routine that most of us now term as life. So many words struggle to make their way out but never survive. This feeling of implosion is something now am used to and losing what I ever wanted now seems inevitable. But deep inside I still intend to challenge the boundaries and limitations that is set aside. I still cant  accept the fact that my life will be governed by these set of rules. Rules none of which I ever made. It might seem that my attempts to escape is feable or near to none, the reason being that, I dont want my freedom, my life to be given as some charity. I want what is mine with all the respect that it deserves and so I decided that I wont escape if ever my only shot at my freedom was a somebody's mistake. Something that otherwise would never have happened. But somewhere deep inside am scared, will it ever happen? Am hopeless, still beliving the fact that a miracle will rescue me or atleast show me that its always worth the wait.

The door is still locked and I still look at the sky. 

its been more than a year now.. and am still waiting... with my soul tarterd but.. waiting...!!!

P.S : This is a very old piece. One I had written quiet long back. Just never had posted it. With so many boxed up dreams and wishes I still wondering if anything has changed over the years.
P.P.S : Hope everybody had a wonderful Christmas..!! AM sorry, I dint wish any but I did pray for all of you.
P.P.S.S : With the new year approaching fast, hope new year resolutions are being jotted on. I just hope I reach 50 followers mark before the year ends :) So keeping a wide eye open for my 50th follower :)




  1. This is very poignant and beautiful, I can definitely relate to this as well. You deserve way more than 50 followers by the way so here's hoping you reach that milestone in the near future.

  2. I must say, some of your best posts are left as drafts.. STOP thinking about what you have to offer to others, be content with what you have to offer yourself .. :)

    This piece is WOW .. i Loved it.. deep and emotional..makes sense to me.. and this is one of your best posts.. :)

  3. Seek and you shall be set free. It's all about letting go.

    May the new year bring you the happiness you have always wished for. Nice read! :D

  4. I knew for sure that behind that funny avatar of yours, there is this emotionally trapped guy :) We ar eall caught in this we of life. Some moments liberate us, some appear to. Until we die, we are left to deal with them :) this post will help you understand yourself better! :) good move!

  5. You be fine. Those dreams will b fulfilled if u truly deserve it. We all have unfulfilled dreams and hope is all we got. Things change even if not too fast. But they do change. Just do ur part and the rest shall follow. I respect u for saying tht u wont accept ur success or freedom to fly if it as a result of somebody elses mistake but in this world, somebody elses mistake is called your Opportunity.
    Can relate to this one.

  6. @RED : Thank you RED.. Will keep in mind about the opportunity. but I was talking about the opportunity thrown as if you are at somebody else's mercy. I dont want that.

    @Akila : Hahahahhahha Harvey two face eh ?? :P Dont we all have our secrets ?? :D

  7. @Rose : Thanks a bunch Rose..!! I have been trying to seek for long now.. and trust me.. the search is still on :) Wish you a very happy new year too

    @CS : Podaa.. :D Hmmmmm.. okie.. will see to it I post my drafts at one point :P hehehehe thanks

  8. @Yammie Waffles : Thanks a lot bud..!! you have always been extremely supportive of my writings. Thank you for taking time to read all of it :) Wish you a happy new year ahead :)

    @Ovais : Welcome back..!! Long time :) Thank you so much.. Glad you liked it :)

  9. dude,
    yes you just had ur 50th follower :)
    so cheers to that
    cheers to the new yr
    and cheers to every good thing around you and me
    and ahh.. for sure if you work towards it you will have your heart swelling with more than a hundred fulfilled dreams :)
    and my prayers are with you.
    take care.

  10. Don't we all feel lost? And don't we all feel like flying away to a place where we could be free? :)
    Don't cut your hair for a few months, and grow your beard, so that you look like Tom Hanks :P

    Happy New Year! Have a blast :) May 2012 make you fatter :P

  11. I love this piece. Few of the lines are so tasteful. I feel like stealing few lines from here...

    Great writing. Happy to be your 51st follower:)

  12. @saru :Hey Saru.. a pleasure to have you here.. Welcome to the Devil's workshop :) Thank you so much.. This coming from you means a lot :)

    @Philo : hey.. Happy new year in advance to you too and well.. I guess i am already looking like one..!! Cave man look is so on :P

    @Suvaiba : Sooooooooo...!!! thank you so much for your nice words and the prayers too.. Inshallah may the new year bring all the dreams and happiness in our lives :) Cheers :)

  13. i can totally relate ... :)
    amazing post .. as always ..
    dude how do you manage to be awesome all the time.? :P
    happy new year...hope you will reach some new heights .. :))